We called him Lin. It was Lin
who insisted that we call him Lin. Lin, based on his favorite book character.
Lin had called me to meet him today. I have known Lin since he was six.
Whenever Lin had called me it was some matter of importance. Lin was looking distressed.
He said, “I have not been able to sleep for the past week. All I do is, just
lie down and stare at the ceiling. And whenever I try to sleep Cold Fish’s
memory haunts me. The day I returned from Cold-Fish’s funeral I dreamt about
Cold –Fish. He was staring at me from the mirror. I couldn’t sleep that night.”
That was the last, I had spoken
to Lin. But then things started to worsen for Lin. He was no more attending
college. He had cut off himself from his family and friends. It had been over a
month he had locked himself in his room. I was worried as I didn’t know how
long it was going to last. What made it harder was Lin too was staying away
from his family.
However suddenly things had changed
for Lin. He started to attend college with more enthusiasm .But I knew there
was something wrong. I had asked Lin what had changed, was he over Cold-Fish’s
death but he managed to avoided the topic every time I bought it up. I was
worried that Lin might be consuming drugs but it was unlikely as he didn’t have
that kind of money. So then what made Lin change. I was curious to find
out.
Lin hadn’t called me to his
place for a month. People, who knew me and Lin, would know that, if we both
were to find, we would be at Lin’s place. So I decided to give him a surprise
visit. I knew Cold-Fish’s chapter was not going to be closed so easily.
Especially for Lin. All my questions were answered. I found that Lin had
started to follow the path of Cold-Fish. He too had started drinking his own
blood. There was blood everywhere as I entered the room. Meanwhile Lin had
passed out. After he regained consciousness I asked Lin the same question he
had posed to Cold Fish, “As to why he hurt himself?” Unlike Cold –fish, Lin
said “It gives me sense of power and control. Also when I cut myself the
pain makes me feel alive. And once you experience pain like this there is no
problem which looks big. Blood has become my drug.” Lin said.
I had my own fears after fine day
was my last session with my psychiatrist .Who am I? I am Cold-Fish also known
as Lin. D out that Lin was following the same footsteps of Cold-Fish. And Lin
too will end life the way Cold Fish did. I didn’t want Lin to waste his life
just like Cold- Fish did. So after speaking to a psychiatrist and explain all
the symptoms of Cold-Fish and Lin. Lin was suffering from disease called
Clinical Vampirism or Renfield's syndrome. It’s a rare psychiatric
disorder in which the sufferer feels a compulsion to consume blood. Its consumption can stimulate a sense
of power and control. As Lin had said, “it gives me sense of power and control”.
The disorder has never been included in the DSM-IV and is very much treatable. Renfield’s Syndrome is
classified as schizophrenia or paraphilia.
It
was after a lot of convincing that Lin agreed to see a psychiatrist. Today
was my last session with my psychiatrist. I
am Cold-Fish, also known as Lin.
